Ki Adept(Tentative Title, haven't figured out what I want to call this
thing) - Prologue

Written by Matdeception

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Disclaimer: Ranma ˝ belongs to some one with talent, and honestly
doesn't give a damn about what we write. I plan on throwing some Gold
Digger in here, possibly other series as well. I'll tackle that hurtle
when I get to it. C&C to narkanarka@hotmail.com - Flames to my dumpster,
and questions about further chapters will be ignored until I can figure
out how to send a virus through the Internet for such a stupid question.
Anyway, enjoy.

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"What the fuck I do now?" I ask, not really expecting an answer, while
dodging high over Akane's 'righteous' hammer blow.

Reflecting on what just transpired, I should have known throwing her
cooking into her face after informing her that she needed to whore
herself out some more was a bad move. Should have, but it just felt so
damn good to watch her food burn and shrivel the hair off her head.
Hell, in my not so humble opinion it increased her gorilla look. Surely
she sees the advantage of my actions! Not only did she save what cash
she had with the lack of needing a haircut, I even proved to her that
her 'cooking' could be used as a weapon! Think of the improvements the
chemical warfare department could benefit from her cooking ability! Heh,
even Nabiki's been encouraging me to do this for the mentally disturbed
girl. Smart girl, Nabiki is.

"RANMA NO BAKA!" The blithering hairless gorilla that is my fiancé yells
at me, unknowingly sending waves of malice and hate induced Ki and
thoughts across the spectrum of my senses.

This is hard to explain, so let me take some time to inform you what it
is I'm talking about. First off, everyone who's anyone knows the whole
Ryoga spiel - Stealing his bread, causing him to become an obsessive
psychopath and how he's always trying to kill me. Especially how he
spent years of his pathetic life tracking me down and all that bull
shit. The truth of the matter is that Ryoga doesn't really hate me, we
get along just fine when were not around Nerima. The reason for his
actions are simple, he, like me, is a telepath. A rare breed of person I
assure you. Telepaths, at least as far as Ryoga and I know, are humans
with extra sensory perception.

We can see, exist, on hundreds of different levels of reality. Our
training in the martial arts heightened this ability, for Ki, or life
force if you will, made it easier to define our reality interactions on
all these levels. As such, we have also become empathic. Normally we
have to put direct concentration into using our powers, but with the
application of Ki it makes it so much easier. As such, we can see - feel
- and understand the intricate detailed weave of life that Ki envelopes,
leading to our now natural empathic abilities.

Anyway, back to the point of the eternally lost pig boy. Ryoga only
followed me because we are one of a kind. Growing up on the road like we
both did, me because of the useless waste of filth I like to call Pops,
and Ryoga because his parents made the mistake of procreating and
passing their directional curse to their slightly mentally unstable
spawn. This provided me with enough proof that brother and sister
shouldn't mate, ah well not my problem. Personally I see it as a cosmic
joke in a way, his directional curse that is. Anyway, we became somewhat
like long lost brothers, so you understand his real reason for following
me everywhere.

Why the whole 'Ranma prepare to die!' theme? Heh. It's all a hoax.
Nerima is what Ryoga and me like to call 'Our Private Joke'. Everyone
thinks were being serious, but were just putting on a show for the
retarded people who live there. Its funny.

Because of our telepathic abilities, and our martial arts skills, we
labeled ourselves 'Ki Adepts'. Sorta to throw people off from the real
truth, that were telepathic. I don't even want to KNOW what could happen
if the governments around the world got wind of our abilities.

Ryoga and I are sorta like precognents. Not so much as in 'We receive
visions' sort of thing, but we feel - understand - and on occasion,
while were not directly using our telepathic powers, gain glimpses of
peoples minds and thoughts via their aura and unconscious Ki Projection.
Like Akane here, after feeling her Ki I suddenly get the distinct
impression of a rusty serrated blade being used to slice my penis in
half, and deep down on a subconscious level she's thinking about raping
me like she does all those animals. It's kinda like getting glimpses of
a grade B horror flick, sends a chill straight up my spine, and causes a
euphoric reaction. Euphoric in the rush of sensory perception, not lust
I assure you.

I crack a grin, thinking of ways to get rid of this annoying gnat for
the rest of the day, to do this I would need to piss her off more than
usual, so she would lose her tenuous grasp over her anger and go over
the edge. Hopefully the end effect being similar to the bomb dropped on
Hiroshima all those years ago. If I'm real lucky, and the rest of the
human race in my perspective, she'll literally blow up. It's a small
price to pay to stop her from polluting the gene pool. Trust me, ever
heard of her animalistic ways? You will.

Twisting in an awkward angel, I bring an end to this internal monologue
and rejoin the world around me as I alight myself on top of the Dojo.
Idly wondering why no one in the household was here to view the event, I
retorted to her useless and rather predictable statement.

"Blow me bitch."

Not classy, hell not even in good taste, but it pisses her off something
fierce. She never forgave me for telling everyone about her 'dog'
fetish. Heh, she really didn't like the videotape I sold to everyone
either. What's so wrong with showing human beings getting back to their
roots? What's wrong with taking pleasure in a carnal act such as dog
raping? Fuck if I care.

"You little shit! I'll fucking kill you for this!" she screeched. I
decided I'd rather be off doing something, or more importantly some one,
so I began sending off waves of calm and suppressive Ki. This is kinda
hard to explain, its more like taking my memories of being in a drug
induced coma and compressing them into soft waves of mental energy,
combining it with my Ki to send it across the different weaves and
dimensions I've discovered in my life.

The purpose of my actions? Simple. By tricking her mind into believing
she wasn't so upset, she began to calm down, while in reality she was
just getting madder and madder by the second. Not many, if any besides
Ryoga, other people know about the different uses of Ki aside from the
physical sense, like what I'm doing now. I like to think of it as the
next evolutionary step for the human species.

Watching her Aura shift slightly, giving me confirmation my plan was
working, Akane began to reign in her anger, all the while thinking she
was getting more control over that homicidal rage she calls 'Tough
Love'. I stop in my dodging, arms now akimbo over my chest, I stand my
ground. If running pisses this pyscho slut off, since she slept with
Kuno a week ago the term fits, then standing your ground is the
equivalent of a low yield nuclear detonation.

"Hey Akane, fuck off or I'll sell those tapes of you and Kuno!" Now,
normally the whole 'dog fucking her up the ass' tape would have been the
worse possible thing that could have happened, but fucking Kuno was a
low even for her.

"You wouldn't dare!" She screeches like the whore I know her to be.

I lament upon seeing her angelic face scrunched up in abject horror.
Once I thought she was the kindest and gentlest soul in the world. She
could do no wrong, she was beautiful, a true goddess among the populace.
That lasted about an hour, being hit with a table generally makes you
reevaluate how you view people.

She's fucked if she thinks I'll back down from those fearful puppy dog
eyes.

Adopting a condescending smirk, I call out in the shrillest voice I
could make, "K-k-kuno! Stop playing around and stick it in already! Use
the Bokken! Use the bokken!" changing back to a manly voice I continue,
"But Akane my love, my heavenly bokken and spear have been in you for
over an hour…" I couldn't help but let off a chuckle at that comment.

"First dog fucking, then Kuno fucking, then we find out your as loose as
a piece of shredded meat. Heh. You're such a slut Akane." Its right
about now I noticed my Ki suppression technique was faltering badly, and
Akane's murderous aura were returning at my desired magnified intent, I
decided to leave before she blew.

"Look bitch, fuck off, go frig yourself - I DON'T CARE! Just leave me
the hell alone!" Jumping from the roof of the Tendo Dojo to the street,
I take off like a bat out of hell, leaving behind 'Hurricane' Akane to
descend on the unsuspecting populace of Nerima.

Feeling an explosion across a wide range of spectrums, from my Ki
spectrum to the Richter scale, I couldn't help but smile.

"Today's turning out to be a great day."

***

Juuban District - Jacks Bar

After ditching my relentless pursuers, I finally arrived at my
pre-determined destination for the night. Walking briskly up to the
establishment, forever known as 'Jack's Bar', I take a moment to review
my surroundings. The place seemed like a hole in the wall, an out of the
way place were only the truly insufferable and depraved would dare go.
Kicking in my Telepathic Senses, I establish connection to my Ki and
scan the building as carefully as I could. I chuckle; everything about
this place is rotten to the core. From the corrupt bouncers, to the
heroine addicts and various whores, and all the way up to 'Stinky' the
bartender. This place was truly a hellhole for the sick, demented, and
'unclean' that the city had to offer.

"Home sweet home."

Stepping through a pair of dented, and in some places rusted, metal
doors I enter the lion's den. My mission of course is not for enjoyment.
If anything, it's a mission to alleviate the weird vibes I've been
getting off Nabs, Kas-chan, Shampoo, and Ukyo. I'm slightly fearful of
this, as they've been acting slightly different ever since that night
Ryoga and me kinda.. well.. we fubared our usually higher dimensional
duel. The type of duel I'm talking about doesn't deal with blows and the
like, more like a contest of wills and the power of our minds.

Anyway, we screwed up and lost control of our telepathic powers
temporarily, releasing all kinds of shit into our heads, as well as the
others who 'happened' to be in the same general vicinity. Personally, I
think we accidentally snagged all the pent up sexual frustration Kasumi
and Ukyo had for us, whatever.

Waking up surrounded by women, in positions that just scream 'Orgy',
generally sends guys into an idiotic grinning mode, I knew better
though. Screwing Shampoo and Nabiki wasn't anything new; Ryoga and me
had done them plenty of times. Some how roping Ukyo, and KASUMI of all
people into an orgy kinda shakes your world down. Every time I see her
smiling at me I wonder if it's her normal 'House wife of Love and
Justice' smile, or the never before seen 'Dominatrix of Hell promising
Intense Pain and Sexual Stimulation' smile. I tell yah, waking up and
seeing Kasumi in a skin tight black leather outfit with spikes, whips,
and chains kinda throw's your general perception of a person out the
window.

Spotting a familiar shock of dark hair, with a glimmer of a yellow/black
bandana I cut straight through the throng of people at the bar - taking
my god damn time to feel up one of the waitresses, then kicking some
whino off his chair in the process of 'acquiring' a seat next to Ryoga.
The Whino glared at me, but bit back his nasty retort and ran crying
like the little bitch he just showed himself to be, while screaming "THE
GOD DAMN YOHITO BROTHERS!!!"

What a stupid fucking name. Leave it to Ryoga to name our little gang
after his first fuck, which happened to be his goddamn aunt. Bunch of
fucking in breeders, ah well - Sloppy seconds wasn't bad for me. I
especially love that thing she did with her tongue, the way it

WHAM!

Recovering from the painful, yet playful punch to the jaw I retort "Ah
come on Ryoga! You know she's the best lay we've had since we got back
from China!" inwardly I'm cursing my forgetful mind. How could I not
realize I was sitting next to one of my own kind and not remember he
could sense and see some of the things I'm remembering?

"Asshole." I mumble, immediately forgetting his transgression when my
eyes wander over a pair of firm buttocks belonging to a nearby waitress.
Yes, I think I just spotted the nights offering to my sexcraft. Ryoga
and me started calling our carnal actions that after viewing some hentai
anime called 'Lablue Girl'. I can't help being a hormonally imbalanced
teenager! My abilities magnified and multiplied those urges! Can't say I
complain to much, especially since I can screw like the pros - going
hours and hours non stop, compile this with my ever growing knowledge of
sexual shiatsu and personal experience with the female body, its turned
me into a literal sex god! At least.. I like to think so, heh, girls
never complained.

A sudden feeling of impending doom washed over me, and I couldn't help
but realize I shouldn't have said this was turning out to be a great
day.

"We got problems bro." Ryoga said in that odd baritone voice of his. I
shudder; nothing good can come from this. He's always been my early
warning system when things were about to blow up big, hell - He foresaw
that whole Saffron thing and we all know how that turned out.

I force myself to discard lecherous fantasies of me and the
aforementioned bar wench fornicating in the near future, and squeak out
what I most feared. "Please tell me they aren't.." I trail off, not
needing to finish this loaded question.

Ryoga, nodded and chuckled darkly at the injustice of it all, or at
least I thought he was laughing at the injustice of it all. In reality,
the psycho shit was about to drop a bomb in my lap bigger than Hurricane
Akane. "Yep, I lucked out though. Only Ukyo - You got all the…" his
statement was cut off as I continuously slam my head into the bar,
breaking the crap rotted wood in the process. "Son of a bitch! What the
fuck am I going to do!"

Ryoga, ever the pinnacle for inspiration replied, "Fuck if I care."
Bastard!

Groaning about the travesty that is my life, I contemplate momentarily
nabbing the Nan Ban Mirror, reaching back three months, and nurturing
myself. How utterly stupid could I be?! Dark thoughts of a little old
lady 'Blessing' me to live a life full of interesting times being
impaled and decapitated filter briefly though my mind, then is discarded
as I contemplate my fucked up near future.

"Guess I should face the music huh?" I ask, but it wasn't really a
question for Ryoga, more or less a pointless statement from the ball of
shit my father sprouted during our years on the Road. Ryoga, again with
his mostly useless advice answered though "I'd think facing them would
be a good idea, but…" he trails off, leaving me to wonder what the hell
he's thinking. Expanding my telepathic powers, I catch a glimpse of a
train, airplane, and a nice hideaway hole. Oddly comforting, and
extremely temping

"Fuck this, I ain't ready to get tied down. To many things, and people,
to do!" So I'm a Casanova, with an ass like mind you would be to! "Least
we didn't think to change me into a girl during that orgy." An
involuntary shiver went down my spine following that statement. I'm
scared to even think how THAT might have turned out.

Ryoga smirked, "Already got a ticket to America, no one would think to
look there." Again I pondered Ryoga's stupidity. America? He's right
about no one thinking to look there, but we don't know shit about the
English, much less their customs! Poor Hinako-sensei hasn't been the
same since we 'accidentally' spiked her heroine. If she's lucky, she'll
recover enough mental faculty to go to the restroom with out leaking all
over the place within the month.

I take a moment to review my surroundings; I just realize the place has
completely emptied out for some reason. What the hell is going on? The
bartender is hiding behind the bar staring fearfully at Ryoga and
myself. It dawns on me, there all a bunch of fuckin pussies! "Man, one
good thing about leaving this shithole - No more of that 'Yohito
Brothers' crap. Really irks me man."

Ah well, once I finish with Ryoga I'm going to make a straight line to
that waitress, the one I plan to have experience why I'm named 'Wild
Horse'. Ryoga simply shrugs, sliding some papers across the bar over to
me. Adopting an inquisitive look, I trace over the papers. Realizing
there's only one ticket, I come to the conclusion he's not coming with
me. Still, had to ask, to be sure. "Ryoga.. you're not coming with me
are you?" he shakes his head, and I ask, "Is Ukyo really THAT good a lay
man?" he nods.

Once again I curse my lame stamina. I bet she would have been a treat to
taste, but lets see any of YOU screw the shit out of three women one
right after the other. Kinda sucks though, I don't remember anything
from that night. Ryoga does, at least he told me he did. "Fine fine,
I'll catch yah later. Need to make a call or two before I skip town."

Ryoga, ever the conversationalist simply nodded, drowning the rest of
his drink. I ponder his sanity, or lack there of. Doesn't he realize
when it becomes common knowledge I knocked up the Tendo Sisters AND
Shampoo that everyone and their slutty mothers were going to try and
track me down? The only logical procedure would be to kick the shit out
of everyone I know until some one squeals like a stuck pig. Ah well,
that's his problem.

Feeling Ryoga's Ire rising, I chuckle, knowing full well he caught my
recent thoughts. Deciding to appear mysterious and demonic, I apply the
Umi-Sen-Ken and fade from existence. Its flashy, sorta, but it leaves
that 'I'm such a badass I don't even need to walk where I want to go
anymore' appearance. Its not teleportation, but it looks like it to the
common human. Smiling to myself, I can only imagine what the rumors will
say about this stunt. Prolly something about magic and demons. Whatever,
I got a call to make, a plane to catch, and one last bar wench to screw
before I start my new life. I'm telling yah, being the best of the
anything goes Carnal and Ariel schools is a full time job

One I wouldn't trade for anything in the world.

To be continued….